Although Calvin is seen bringing a lunchbox to school, his lunch is usually packed in a brown paper bag.
Lunch at Calvin's school
Calvin's homemade lunch is typically a peanut butter and/or jelly sandwich. However, he usually pretends his lunch is something revolting. His made-up lunches include:
- Squid eyeball sandwich. Calvin claimed to enjoy sucking out the retinas.
- Dachshund meat (actually bologna).
- Processed mouse loaf sandwich.
- Slug sandwich.
- Bug Butter on toast. Bug Butter is a paste that consists of a jarful of flies mashed with a spoon.
- Thermos full of phlegm.
- Squid and pickle sandwich. Calvin may or may not have made this up.
- Cow pie.
Calvin also pitched this supposedly great idea to Susie: to mix his solid lunch with the milk in his thermos, shake ardently, and drink the liquefied contents (thus saving his teeth "undue wear and tear"). Moreover, Calvin has played with his food with the intent to disgust his neighbors.
In one comic, Calvin said that the squid in his sandwich wasn't fresh and that the pickles had rotted to pulp. He then asked Susie if she would trade with him. Sickened, Susie left, and Calvin grumbled to himself, "Nobody will trade with a kid whose mom makes a bad sandwich."
Calvin has gotten cafeteria food in addition to his own lunches. We can see from this that the cafeteria's meals include tapioca, bologna sandwiches, beanie-weenies (which Calvin interpreted as "cigar butts in gallstone sauce"), manicotti, several kinds of fruit, ice cream sandwiches, and Twinkies. Susie also eats cafeteria lunches for the most part, although she is seen bringing homemade lunches as well.Calvin mostly seems to like the cafeteria meals, but has professed disgust for the lunchroom tapioca. The tapioca appears as a nondescript greenish blob similar to Calvin's dinner, somewhat explaining Calvin's dislike for it.
Lunch monstersThere have been incidents where Calvin was attacked by his lunch. One incident was when his lunch bag attacked while he was trying to find out what he was having for lunch. After being knocked to the ground, Calvin beat back his assailant by smashing the bag repeatedly with his thermos, killing it and causing it to bleed jelly.
Another incident was when Calvin suspected that something in his peanut butter sandwich was alive. When he examined it, the peanut butter leapt up and smothered him. However, Calvin managed to overpower his attacker and drowned the peanut butter with chocolate milk.