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Chewing Magazine

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Gum Mags

Calvin and Hobbes discuss the various chewing gum magazines.

Calvin is a regular reader of Chewing Magazine, a publication for gum hobbyists which Calvin claims to be a "high-gloss, literate and sophisticated" magazine. However, Hobbes realizes it is an extremely commercialized publication, whose content aims only to increase profits for sponsors. As such, Hobbes expresses overall disgust for the magazine, much in the same way as he disagrees with Calvin about his Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs.

Known Content

  • Special issues, such as one on the choice of available sugarless gum.
  • Reviews of gum-chewing apparel, such as a perspiration-proof jersey covered in brand logos and fashion knee pads for ambulatory chewing.
  • An article advising one to "warm up" before chewing. These warmups prevent the incurring of injuries due to neglect of stretching the temporalis muscles.
  • Articles detailing how to set up a "mandibular fitness regime". With this interval training regime, one can build muscle strength and tenacity for better chewing.
  • Articles on tongue exercises to blow bigger bubbles.
  • Jaw exercise articles.
  • Reader surveys. Calvin falsifies his answers to mislead pollsters.
  • At least one quiz. The ten-question "Does Your Gum Deliver?" quiz allowed the reader to determine if his brand of gum was giving him "all that he was entitled to".
  • An article that compares the top five brands of chewing gum based on flavor retention, elasticity, bubble capacity, and chewing rebound. It was accompanied by a computer graph which demonstrated compensation for various saliva acidities and allowed the reader to select the best gum for his style.
  • Updates on available gum flavors.
  • An interview with Bazooka Joe.
  • Scores of manipulative advertisements.

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